We all experience moments of stress each day of our lives. Whether it is the biologically low stress of simply waking up each morning or the emotionally high stress of an argument with your mother, stress is unavoidable. Here are 7 things that I do (or at least try to) each day to help withstand the daily onslaught of stress we all experience. Use them, make them a part of your life, and you will be on your way to a less stressful way of living.
1. Wake Up 30 Minutes Earlier
This fist way toward a less stressful life is unique in that it leads into and encapsulates the next two items on this list, which cannot be done effectively before doing this thing first. It may seem that waking up 30 minutes earlier everyday will have an adverse effect and could actually cause more stress to occur throughout the day. No one wants to have 30 minutes of sleep time shaved off, which can cause grogginess and fatigue, especially for those that have developed a set morning routine.
To combat this, all you have to do is turn off Netflix and put the phone down 30 minutes earlier before bed to balance out the lost time in the morning. Go to bed earlier to wake up earlier. It really is that simple. You might have to alter your daily routine for this to become a reality, especially in the evening, but it’s only 30 minutes and shouldn’t take too much effort to develop a new, slightly altered regimen. The benefits of the having an extra 30 minutes available each morning will become apparent with the next two items on this list.
2. Stretch For 10 Minutes
Waking up 30 minutes earlier will allow you to connect with yourself and with nature before battling the intensity of the work day, (or any other day for that matter). Through the simple act of stretching, you prepare both mind and body to effectively handle stress. It stimulates your muscles and gets your blood pumping, waking your brain up early to provide better concentration, focus and decision making.
Scores of simple 10 minute or less stretching routines can be found on YouTube or are available for download on your fitness app. Better yet, take the time to create and develop your own stretching routine, which is targeted only to you. Explore your body to find out which muscles would benefit the most from such a workout. I would suggest squeezing or testing each muscle in your body individually. If you feel pain or tightness, mark it down and target that area in your stretch routine. Put your body into positions it hasn’t experienced in a while, like this one:
Or how about positions that you’ve never done before, like this one:
By incorporating stretching into your daily activity, especially first thing in the morning, you will give yourself a head start in battling the stress of everyday life.
3. Don’t Rush to Work
Each morning during my commute, I watch as countless drivers speed past me, swerve across lanes without using blinkers, and ride the bumpers of cars in front of them. Meanwhile, there I am in the right lane cruising five to eight MPH over the speed limit, coasting to work, where I always arrive with minutes to spare. I sip my coffee as cars whiz by in the left lanes, wondering why so many people drive so recklessly first thing in the morning. Are that many people running late for work? Is everyone in competition with each on the road to see who can drive the fastest or the coolest?
Whatever their motives for driving like banshees, they are only succeeding in elevating their stress level before the workday even begins. They arrive to work highly irritated and brash, placing a dark cloud over the entire workplace. It seeps into their job performance, lowering their quality of work as they are continually preoccupied with the idiot that wouldn’t let them pass this morning.
The previous items on this list places you in a relaxed state even before getting the behind the wheel. The first gives you extra time to prepare yourself for the day; while the second calms your nerves and awakens your body. If you wake up 30 minutes early and stretch for 10 minutes, that leaves you with 20 minutes of extra time to work with. I suggest you insert 10 minutes of that excess time into your commute. It will allow you to drop back into the right lane and enjoy the pleasure of driving. To take in the scenery, actually listen to the radio, while sipping your favorite morning drink.
If you’re usually on time to work, arriving early will be a nice pleasure for you. You will appreciate how just a few extra minutes before logging or clocking in can help mentally prepare you for the workday.
4. Be Still
I am not speaking of meditation, which is something my mind will not let me do. I’m talking about merely existing, while being present and not doing anything in particular. The practice of meditation is a structured program containing rules and requires specific environmental and internal stipulations to be followed in order to be effective. Apparently, my brain does not like to do that. So I choose, instead of forcing myself to be completely still while trying to think about nothing, to use periods of organic inactivity to clear my mind. This method allows periods of internal reflection to occur naturally during the day. I do not set aside specific days or times for this. I just let it happen as it occurs, without judgement or expectation.
For example, sometimes when I get home from work, the first thing I do is plop down on the couch, especially on hot days because it’s right in front of the air conditioner. Before I know it, I’m laying down. Soon after, I’m lost in the thoughts and images of my day as they scurry through my mind and across the canvas of the ceiling. I’ll lay there for a few minutes longer while acknowledging the stuff in my mind’s eye. Other times, I go outside to feed my cat and her two months old kittens. On days when they are too cute to ignore, I’ll sit in a chair on the porch and watch the feline family as they eat. 10 minutes later, I realize that I have been zoned out, lost again in my own mind.
Simple and seemingly trivial moments like these are abundant in normal everyday activity. No yoga mat required and no breathing exercises needed. All you really have to do is be present and exist. You will find that you daydream more than you realize if you make a conscious effort to recognize when you are doing so. Daydreams are themselves a form of subconscious meditation. However, they appear during the day, while we’re doing stuff, and are instantly dismissed when we become aware of them. What might we learn if we were able to follow and explore them?
5. Write Stuff Down
As a writer, there is no better way for me to process my thoughts and emotions. But you don’t have to be a prolific author (which I am not) for this to be effective. It’s all about getting stuff out of your head, which is where the most damage occurs. Our minds process thousands of pieces of information on a daily basis, both subconsciously and consciously. We also experience a range of emotions throughout the day that we are not always able to process as they occur. When this happens, the brain takes it upon itself to processes those emotions, often at the wrong times. In order to prevent balling your eyes out during your lunch break, use that time write down how you’re feeling while you eat. It doesn’t have to be a pen and paper. The simple notebook app on your phone will do perfectly. All you need is somewhere to dump that stuff out of your head before the day is over and you’re laying up in bed, staring at the ceiling until three in the morning.
The thoughts and emotions of the day need to come out somehow. You don’t want them to accumulate until they burst out in a temper tantrum when someone cuts in front of you at Walmart. The simple act of writing out your feelings and then rereading them is extremely therapeutic. It always works for me and I highly recommend it.
If necessary, take this practice a step further by burning the paper after you’ve written and read over your words. Obviously, I don’t suggest you throw your phone into the fireplace, but balling up a piece of paper and tossing it into the fire will allow you to watch a day’s worth of stress go up in flames, symbolically cleansing your soul and freeing your mind for the more important things in your life.
6. Smile at Someone
Depending on your temperament, this may not be an issue for you. But for those of you like me, who avoid eye contact like COVID and never initiates conversation, a simple smile can be a quick and easy way to melt away the stress of a bad day. Even in the midst of the most irritating and soul crushing day imaginable, a smile always makes me feel better. The effect is amplified for me because giving someone eye contact with cheesy grins on our faces is something I rarely do. But when it does happen, it takes me by surprise and gives me tingles in my face and tummy, effects of the dopamine and endorphins and stuff. My body and psyche both instantly respond to the human interaction and my day becomes a bit more brighter.
I wish I could incorporate this simple act into all phases of my everyday life, but it is not something I’m accustomed to. It’s a shame because I know the benefits would be great for my temperament. This is something that I need to make a conscious effort to do. Even at the age 43, there are things I can learn to make myself a better overall person. Smiling at someone for no apparent reason is one of them, but I’ll have to practice smiling naturally so I don’t creep people out.
7. Have an Orgasm
Saved the best for last. I shouldn’t have to go into much detail about this wonderful form of stress release. We all know how satisfying and relaxing a good oragasm can be. I mean the act actually produces dopamine and endorphins (just like smiling does!) in the brain, while it’s occurring. What better way to release stress is there? It’s natural and can literally be done anywhere. However, I wouldn’t recommend doing anything illegal like masturbating in the parking lot of Kroger because the checkout lines were too long. But if waiting in long lines is a pet peeve of yours, just keep yourself in check until you get home and release yourself then.
Whether it be the intimate love making with the love of your life, the self guided, custom made satisfaction of self love, or the wham bam quick release from a one night stand (although this method may actually add stress), a fulfilling orgasm not only feels amazing, but also heals your mind and body. It instantly relaxes you and can actually put you to sleep if you’re in a fatigued state. Some of the best sleep I’ve ever had occurred after having an amazing orgasm.
If this last item of my list for living a stress free life is offensive or making you blush, I apologize. But I feel that I would not be giving my readers justice if I didn’t include this very satisfying form of stress release. If you’re not involved with anyone or don’t masturbate, I would suggest you consider both of those options, especially if it’s been a while since you’ve had an orgasm. The very natural and instinctual act of coming, even just once, could change your entire personality and will send you on the way to enjoying a stress free life.
Jay Owens 